Life’s journey often leads us to reflect on our past selves—the dreams, struggles, and growth that shaped us. In this letter to my 20-year-old self, I share lessons, forgiveness, and gratitude, celebrating the resilience that defines who I am today.
Dear 20-year-old me,
I see you standing at the crossroads of who you are and who you want to become. You’re filled with so much hope, so much fear, and so many questions. You’re trying your best to figure it all out, and even though it doesn’t feel like it now, that effort alone is enough.
I forgive you. I forgive you for not becoming who you thought you’d be by now. For the dreams you left unfinished, for the plans you couldn’t follow through on. I forgive you for letting fear get in the way, for doubting yourself, for playing it safe when you should’ve leaped. I forgive you for worrying about everything—for every sleepless night, you spent replaying mistakes and imagining disasters that never came.
I forgive you for being so hard on yourself, for expecting perfection when all you needed was progress, and for holding on to guilt over things you couldn’t control. I forgive you for buying books you never read—stacked like little towers of guilt in the corner of your room. And yes, I forgive you for the late nights, the impulsive spending, and the financial mess you sometimes made of things.
But oh, how I want to thank you. Thank you for your resilience, for keeping me alive. For holding on through the darkest nights when the pain felt endless. Thank you for not giving up, even when you felt like you had nothing left to give. You fought for us in ways you’ll never fully understand.
Thank you for loving me and learning to love yourself when no one showed you how. That love was imperfect, fragile, and slow—but it was real. Coming from a broken family could’ve broken you, but you chose to rise. You taught yourself to nurture, care, and believe you were worthy. Your journey to self-love was powerful and inspiring. Thank you for that.
Thank you for every time you picked yourself up. After every betrayal, after every heartbreak. For finding the strength to trust again, even when it felt impossible. You refused to let bitterness take root. Instead, you chose to grow, slowly but surely, through every pain and every failure. Your resilience is a testament to your strength.
I’m not where we thought we’d be at 35, but I’m here. I’m alive. I’m still trying, still dreaming, still learning. And that’s because of you. You laid the foundation for everything I am today—the good, the bad, the unfinished. You were never perfect, but you were always enough. Your achievements, no matter how big or small, are worth celebrating.
So here’s to you, 20-year-old me. The dreamer, the fighter, the survivor. You did so much more than you’ll ever realize. And I’ll always carry that with me.
With love and gratitude,
35-year-old you
